Sunday, May 21, 2006

Funky Town

I don't know what it is about this weekend, but I have just not been able to get motivated about doing anything. I've basically laid around the house all weekend watching TV, which is something I don't do on the weekends.

It's some sort of a funk I'm in. I'm not down or anything, at least not about stuff that would affect me doing stuff. I just don't feel like doing anything. I haven't really felt like being on the computer, in front of the TV, reading, out doing something active or anything. I'm just kind of here and bored. lol.

I get like this for a day every once in a while, but it usually ends pretty quickly. This has been going on for three or four days now. I have managed to force myself to get some things done, but not much.

I think maybe I've just got some decisions and some direction changes on my mind that have temporarily halted me in my pursuits, or some philosophical crap like that.

I don't know, it's just strange. The odd thing is several people online and in person around me are all in states of frustration as well. Maybe it's just something that's going around.

If I really dug deep I think I know what the real problem is, but it's a hard one to face, so I ignore it. :)

I'm not looking for pats on the back or encouragement at this point, or anything like that. I just felt like writing out what I was feeling and figured why not lay myself open to the scrutiny of thousands of potential readers? Of course I don't get even hundreds of readers each week so maybe it's not that big of a revealing moment. Whatever.

Either way, that's one of the reasons I started this blog. I've attempted to keep traditional journals before, but months and sometimes years would pass between entries. With the computer for whatever reason I am more prone to keep up with it.

Of course I still wouldn't post my most personal thoughts here for the world to see, but at least I can use this space as both an outlet for some things and to continue to showcase my work and talk about whatever floats my boat any given day. That's a good thing to have.

Speaking of the blog, I am getting real ansy about the website, which I haven't worked on in a week. And my self-imposed deadline is fastly approaching. But today and yesterday I made minor changes to the sidebar and am looking forward to changing the entire look of the blog eventually. I haven't figured out how exactly I'm going to implement the blog into the site yet, whether I will do it as the main page or a link, or how I'm going to get it to match the layout of the site as I can't stand sites that have forums and blogs, stores, etc. that don't match the site design - just a pet peeve of mine.

Hopefully it will all come together.

Anyway, here it is 10pm Sunday evening and I'm ranting about absolutely nothing. I guess all I have left to say is keep an eye on this blog as I feel big changes are coming soon - at least big to me...I think...

B-Out

1 comment:

Jason Berek-Lewis said...

Well, I know how you feel as I am going through one of my - Is it really worth it phases, where I am questioning all the work I put into my columns and scripts, even wondering wether I should keep collecting comics.

I blame the weather. It is coming towards winter here in Melbourne and I always get down and directionless when it gets colder ... Come spring, I will be re-energised and ready to take on the world!